Creme Egg by Rhianna

“Can I go to the sweet shop now?”
Rosa asked her mother Mandy for the fourth time that hour.
“Every time you ask, it’s one more day until we go. All you ever talk about are those
Magic crème eggs!” Her mother responded. It’s true. The crème
Eggs really were magic.
Each day, Rosa looked out her bedroom window. The
Gigantic sweet shop was just across the road, and of course the expanding crème eggs were
Going out of stock fast. Rosa looked at her piggy bank.
She had just enough to buy a magic crème egg.
Attacking her glass window until it broke,
Rosa grabbed her money and ran across the road. AAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Everything went black…
Mandy looked down at her unconscious child -in a coma-
And the tubes attached to her. Nurses were feeding her through a
Giant tube (the biggest of the 27). Suddenly Mandy remembered those last words her daughter said.
“I want you to feed her the expanding crème eggs. Now.” A
Crème egg, the last one, was bought, and fed to Rosa. “MOTHER!”
A nurse called Lucy told a shocked Rosa what had happened to her.
Lucy then let her mother speak to her. “Why is your window broken, Rosa?”
The crème egg floated down the mountain. The boy checked
His phone.
It
Showed the time: 8:47am. Only a few minutes left until his plan would be done.
Imaginative. That’s what they called him at
School.
Capable of doing anything. That’s what his friends said.
Overprotective. That’s what his enemies called him. He was
Done with everyone labelling him. Done with
Everyone calling him names.
He would show them.
Everyone would know that he is evil.
Like it or not, the disaster would take place in 5. 4. 3. 2. 1.

Push!

Food of the gods menu by Rhianna

This spectacular meal is proven to work wonders with your taste buds, and once you’ve tried some of this ultra-magnificent meal then you will go, “Yeeeeeeee!” with excitement. You will want to try it again and again and again until you… Well you will never want to stop. Here is what this three-course meal entails:

For starters, a delicious mouth-watering French-stick pizza is made in a pizza oven.You can smell it from down the hallway! This pizza is lavished with stringy melting cheese, and has a base of tomato purée, and tinned tomato chunks. Remember; don’t get yourself too full, for this is only a starter!

Our miraculous main course consists of a 5oz gammon steak (already cut up into bite-size chunks), sweet potato fries, salad, two rings of pineapple and a fried egg. You can just hear the sizzling of gammon and the crackling of the salt dissolving into the heat of the chips. The salad adds a nice healthy twist, and keeps you feeling fresh. The sight of this flavoursome dinner will put you on edge, especially the textures of the bittersweet grilled pineapple… Mmmmmmm!!!

Your dessert is an iced cinnamon roll. Legend has it, the mystical Unipandasloth will grant you free cinnamon rolls once you die, if you eat more than 100 in your life. I hope this is true – I believe it! Perfection? I think you mean cinnamon rolls. These iced swirls add a complimentary touch to every meal- especially this one.

Thank you for reading the Food Of The Gods menu.

Skellig (opening) by Rhianna

I looked down at the mysterious murky-blue water below. I am literally the unluckiest boy on the planet. All my ancestors are suicidal. I was born to a hippie dad who does bad jokes all of the time, and my mother embarrasses me 24/7. Both of them met here, considering jumping off this ancient, abandoned turret. It brings peace to me now, knowing that they met here, and now I’m alive.

I am not usually this depressed. It’s just that we’ve moved house, and I now have the neighbour from hell: my future self. Nobody actually knows this, of course, except me. I am his splitting image. He has my grey eyes and a sense of trouble about him. I happen to like trouble.

I can’t help but doing bad things. Getting into a ‘heated discussion’ about racism with my PHSE teacher may not have been one of my smartest moves (I sort of got him kicked out of school because I annoyed him so much that he slapped me), but hey, I had a lot to learn since yesterday. Yes. That happened yesterday.

Anyway. The reason I am here is because my family have announced some news. I’m having a new baby sibling. Great. Now my life isn’t even worth living. I have always told myself that I wouldn’t let myself be like my relatives, that I wouldn’t jump off the turret, like all my ancestors did. This house has been in the family for ages. We only moved here because my last relative jumped down. I don’t even know how he managed to jump. He was ninety.

I might jump off here. Why am I living anyway? I’m going to die anyway, so I have nothing to lose. My whole family tree is heaped down there, generation after generation of hysterical people; suicidal cases.

Wait, should I? 

Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. 

As the feathers from the starling murmuration fall down, I make my final decision.

SPLASH!

Writing a letter in character

We have been reading 'Goodnight Mr Tom' by Michelle Magorian. Today we were replying to a letter from Mrs Beech as if we were Tom Oakley.

Original letter:

Dear Sir or Madam,

I asked if Willie could go and stay with God-fearing people so I hope he is. Like most boys he's full of sin but he's promised to be good. I can't visit him. I'm a widow and I haven't got the money. The war and that. I've put the belt in for when he's bad and I've sewn him in for the winter. I usually keep him in when I wash his clothes and I got them special for the cold weather so he should be alright. Tell him his Mum said he'd better be good. 

Mrs. Beech

This was Sophie's reply:

Dear Mrs Beech,

My name is Tom Oakley and I am the person who is taking care of Willie I would also like to you to tell you that Willie has got here safely and he has settled in very well, he is a very quiet boy. I live near a church like you wanted and I read him bible stories every night. Also, he hesitates to ask questions but I answer them anyway. He is very polite and is never naughty I don’t feel the need to use the belt. He has been coming on walks with me and is getting used to the countryside, as it is very different to London, I promise to take good care of him. I am sorry that you can’t come down but we will carry on writing to you to let you know what’s happening. I am quite worried that he can’t read and write for most of the children down here can read and write by the age of around six but anyways, I’ll help him but I am confused to why he didn’t get any help. I you don’t mind me asking did you help Willie with his work? Willie has told me he had no friends but he has made good friends with Sammy and they love going on walks with each other. As it is his birthday in a few days I will give him some presents and throw him a party.

Yours sincerely

Tom Oakley 

Lisa's letter:

Dear Mrs Beech,

William has settled in well and the billeting officer has given him to a religious person, I do live near a church and I am a regular attender. I always go to church on a Sunday so I hope you are okay with him staying with me. I have not needed to use the belt and I do not intend to do so. He seems to like the village and he does enjoy staying here. We are going to my friend’s house later, after lunch, so that I can have a talk with my friend and his wife because I have not seen them for a while and William can have some orange juice or something while we are there. I told William that after I have written to you we will have some lunch. He has been very well behaved and when he returns home I would ask you not to punish him for behaving terribly because he has been on his best behaviour for me as you said for him to do so. As his mother you will know that is his birthday is very soon as it is on Thursday and I was going to do a little celebration for that, hopefully he will enjoy that. I am also hoping that he will make some new friends over the next couple of days so that we have some people that we can invite to join us. He has already made one friend as he has made good friends with Sammie, they often enjoy going for long walks together and playing in the fields.

From Mr Tom Oakley

 Cloud's letter:

Dear Mrs. Beech,

My name is Tom Oakley and I am currently caring for your child Willie, I am writing to inform you that Willie has settled nicely in my home. Although I am not very experienced with children hopefully I will not have to use the belt that you have sent me because he seems very well behaved. I am a bit concerned about his health though because he has been throwing up a lot lately but luckily I have been able to take him to the village doctor, the doctor informed me that it is a result of malnutrition. As you have requested he is staying in my cottage which is by a Church and I have been reading him stories from the holy Bible that he brought with him. One thing I have noticed though is that he hesitates to ask questions and has been showing some very strange behaviour for example when I put him to bed instead of getting on the bed he hid under the bed and curled up into a ball. He seemed very surprised when I told him that he could actually sleep on the bed under the covers. I have also noticed that he cannot read and write but we won’t have to worry about that because he will be attending the local school. He has also made good friends with Sammy and they enjoy going out on walks in the morning. 

Yours sincerely,

Tom Oakley.

Kirsten's version:

Dear Mrs. Beech, 

My name is Thomas Oakley. I am looking after your son whilst the war is in place. I live in Little Weirwold and I will take good care of your son. William has been very good, not mischievous at all! He misses you very much but is coping okay. He likes his new home and is to start school soon. I understand that you can’t visit, that is fine. I haven’t used the belt yet, and the behaviour that William is giving me is amazing so I won’t need to be using it. I live near a church and was once religious before my wife died. I read him bible stories every night and take him round the church and the graveyard. He says his prayers at the correct times. Your son keeps learning new things when I take him for walks (I couldn’t believe that he’d never seen a cow before)! He likes his clothes a lot and I am looking to get him some new ones. I told him to be good and he has been. He is a polite, quiet, kind and friendly boy. He must have changed since you last saw him. I don’t really know a lot about looking after children, but I do know your son is a nice person.

William is good friends with Sammy and they enjoy long walks together. I know you think dogs are fierce and poisonous, but I think differently. William likes playing with my dog, Sammie.

I hope you are okay and we wish to see you soon after the war is over.

Yours sincerely,

Tom Oakley

Tyler S's letter:

Dear Mrs Beech,

I received Willie from the Billeting officer yesterday. Willie is a quiet, shy little boy who doesn’t always reply joyfully to everything you say. He is very well behaved, so there will be no need for the belt you inserted into the bag. As requested, Willie is living near a church with me in Little Weirwold. I read a story from the Bible to him every night. I give him all of his meals each day and he has a little bed in my attic to sleep in every night. Willie is an unconfident boy, that’s probably to do with the fact that he has a new house, village, routine etc. I’m sure he’ll get more confidence by the days he is with me.

He has made good friends with Sammy, like going out to play and going out on long walks.

As long as he’s with me, he’ll be safe.

Yours sincerely,

Tom Oakley. 

Rhianna's letter:

 Dear Mrs Beech,

I would like to say that your son has reached his new home for the next couple of years. I live in a cottage in the town of Little Weirold, and there is a church 200 yards away. As you requested, I am a Christian, and attend the local church frequently. Every night I read a Bible story to Willie, and he seems to be taking them in. 

He has been very good. In fact, I didn’t have to tell him to behave. He has made friends with Sammy, and they enjoy spending time together. Willie has settled in well, and has his own room and is eating well.

I do not intend to use the belt that you have given me, even if he doesn’t behave, as it is just plain wrong to beat a child. Although I am a single parent (of Willie) and find it hard, as you are, we don’t have to resort to whipping. I have never hurt a child, and I never will. I strongly encourage you to stop when he comes home. I’ll still keep the belt though, as it fits nicely around my waist. Thanks for the belt!

Kind Regards, 

Thomas Oakley, temporary father of William.

Love, 

William

The Lost Thing by Rhianna

Starting my day was always the same: going down to the beach and collecting bottle-tops. I have an amazing selection of bottle-tops, and I was hoping to find some more. But what I found instead was even better. I found a bell. It had a swirly pattern, and was a bit rusted. I picked it up, and it ringed. I put it in my rucksack (an upcycled dustbin) and stood still, thinking about why it was there. Then it rang again, or at least I thought it was the bell. I looked up, and I found something amazing.
It was round, like a vase, or a teapot with no handle. It was around 6 metres tall, or 3 times the height of me. It has an orangey-red coat of rust around it. It had doors and entrances in all shapes and sizes. It was the Lost Thing.

I was a bit apprehensive to discover what it really was, so I decided to make a peaceful approach. Nerve-rackingly, I opened one of its many doors, and called, “Hello?” but there was no reply. I think the peaceful approach didn’t work. The door shut itself, and began making a lot of whirring noises, and crashing noises. As this point, I was scared out of my mind, and I was about to run away, but then I was intrigued, as the lower hatches began to open, and tentacles sprouted out. Two ‘arms’ appeared, with bells for hands. Out of its ‘mouth’ there appeared a beach ball. I did question this, but then I remembered that finding the Lost Thing was questionable in itself.
I grabbed the beach ball and threw it to him, and he caught it and deftly passed it back. It was like a dog, in the aspect that it loved to throw and catch balls. We’d been doing it for a couple of hours, but it didn’t get bored. 

Meerkats by Rhianna

She was waiting for the right moment to turn it off, but she just couldn’t. She tried, but she just stood there, transfixed, face blank. Nobody had spoken for the last four hours, and they just stood there, in silence, watching ‘Dance Moms’. They couldn’t care less if it wasn’t from their nationality, as they watched anything they could grab their large, chubby hands on.

The box set came to an end, and so her father put on a documentary about meerkats. She wished she could scream, “WHAT IS GOING ON‽I WANT TO ACTUALLY DO SOMETHING!” but she couldn’t. They were just too cute. A meerkat was prowling around, and then another one joined it, and they started digging in the sand. Happily, they started yapping together, about who-knows-what. Back in the lounge, everybody just stood there.

Then the meerkats looked straight at the camera, and began to look sad. She wondered why. She hoped they would lighten up a bit. In a trice, they pounced at the screen, and began to claw away at the screen. They got through, and jumped straight out of the television! “Okay, okay. Baaaadddd kitty. Baaaaaaaddddd kitty. Please go away!” said her brother, his belly wobbling as he leant over to grab the crisps. He was seventeen, and already twice the size and weight of their eighteen year old cousins. The cousins were mildly obese. So that says a LOT about him. “HOW COULD YOU‽ YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW THE NAME OF THE POOR CREATURES, AND YOU’VE BEEN WATCHING THE STUPID DOCUMENTARY FOR TWO AND A HALF HOURS NOW! TWO AND A HALF!” she shouted. She was working herself up into a state now, and ran out the room.

By this time, the sitting room (well the main one, because they sit down 99.999% of the time) was absolutely jam-packed with meerkats, more meerkats and even more meerkats. They began to search for a better place, so they took a left and began to raid the pantry and kitchens. Surprisingly enough, they didn’t touch the food, and they only took the orange juice, and the milk. Then they came back with a load of cards and board games. They played blackjack, monopoly, snap, and Lego.

They carried on playing for another half an hour, with the family staring with open mouths. They were practically gasping for breath, except the little girl. She knew what was happening, and what was going to happen next. So she got her camera out, and took a bunch of pictures. She must have shied them away, because the next minute they left the door open behind them, and started waving goodbye.

The family thought it was only fair that instead of watching the television, they started socializing and playing monopoly until the day ended. They were sad to see the meerkats go, but they knew that they had taught them a valuable life lesson.

The next morning, the girl went to school. She took her photos with her for show and tell, and when it was her turn, all they said was, “Nice Photoshop.”